From the incident where i got approved by AIESEC to volunteer to Taiwan, finally crossing out something from my dream board, but ended up rejecting it because of family reasons,
to today's (01/07/2016) exam that i thought i was so confident in but ended up screwing my paper (i guess they call this over-confidence?).
Heartaches and sadness are the easiest thing to get over because you cry, you sleep, you eat, and it will go anyway,
but the pieces that form regrets, disappointments and sometimes even reasons of being mad at yourself will always be there.After realizing that i screw up half of my accounting paper today, i was literally drown in sorrows, heartbreaks, anger at my own stupidity and all kinds of the saddest emotions you can have.
Of course, it went off real quick after a few good rounds of food and entertainment,
but at the end of the night, the disappointments and regrets never left, including the ones that were left over from the AIESEC incident.
Yes, the people around you might tell you to stop being sad, they tell you that it's fine to not always be perfect, and also they will always manage to convince you that it's not your fault to not achieve certain expectations, but at the end of the day, the decision of letting things go comes back to you.
I'm not that kind of girl who let things go easily. I struggle a lot, especially when i have too much expectations when i put in tons of effort.
Yes, people always say that "if you don't expect too much, then you won't get too much disappointments".
I never really agree much on it because i always say, if you want to do it, work for perfection. Hence i always believe "how much effort paid, how much you get in return", expectations are always there.
I find it hard to get through this because I can never forgive myself for making such a mistake.
I bet anyone can hardly understand how does it feel to be so so disappointed when you were so good in tutorials but make a simple mistake that could ruin your entire question in the exam.
Even up till just now in the evening, i started to doubt my capability for the next three papers. :(
WHAT DID I REALLY DO TO DESERVE THIS?
Getting through it is hard, but there's a will, there's a way. I guess mine has always been musics and lyrics (yes i'm much of a kpop addict, why?).
Tomorrow | BTS
"Tomorrow" has always been my favorite song since I entered university and it has accompany me through three semesters, now the forth.
The lyrics are a definite must-read! They never fail to motivate me and pick me up from a lot of fear and failures, including this time.
These are two of my favorite verse: (also because it's my bias part la k hehe)
I guess in Chinese we call this “不忘初心”? Even in the far future when they have a lot more new songs releasing, this song will always be my favorite. ❤
"니 꿈을 따라가
무너진대도 뒤로 달아나지마"
Because you're too young to stop, xx
